Being on the Same Team: Money and Marriage

I was talking to a friend of mine who recently started a budget. It is encouraging to see him make goals and work for them. He is enjoying the small steps he’s taking. Starting a budget has given him some financial freedom and relieved a lot of stress regarding his financial situation. Because he knows that I budget, we talk a good bit about what to do and how our budgets are going. Recently he made the comment that his significant other was about to take the little bit of money they had saved together to go shopping. After some further questions, it was apparent that the two of them are on the same page as far as budgeting, but not on the same page as far as what they are budgeting for.

This caused me to think about my own situation. As a newly married guy, my wife and I talk about finances often. We make our financial decisions together and have agreed upon goals that we are aiming for regarding our finances. But the more I talk to other people the more I realize that this is not the norm. If you are married or in a relationship, it is important that your finances are something you both agree on because:

1. Disagreements over money is the leading cause of divorce. Talking about your finances will help ensure your relationship stays healthy.

2. It is important to agree on the same goals. Like in my friends situation, they both agreed saving was a good idea, but they did not agree on what they were saving for. So they actually end up competing against each other instead of working with each other to achieve the end goal.

3. Due to different upbringings, people have different ideas about how to deal with their finances. Talking through these differences and coming to mutual decisions will not only strengthen your finances, but will also strengthen your relationship as you learn how to compromise and work through a situation.

4. People are selfish. Marriage is teaching me just how selfish I truly am. Agreeing on your finances will ensure that you are not out doing your own thing at the expense of your significant other. If you are not willing to set aside your selfish for the benefit of the relationship you probably shouldn’t be in that relationship in the first place.

The important thing to remember is relationships are like teams to an extent. When you’re on a team, sometimes you have to work together to achieve common goals. Same thing with your finances in a relationship. You should agree on common, and many times specific, goals and then work together to achieve them.

What are your thoughts on finances and relationships? How do you go about reaching financial goals within a relationship?

It Will Pay Off

According to the 2014 Wells Fargo Millennial Study, only 55% of millennials are saving for retirement. That means that roughly half of my generation has started saving for retirement. Which is a good thing. The bad thing is that means that half of my generation has not even started saving for retirement in the form of an IRA, 401(k), TSP or any sort of retirement account. You would think after seeing what a lot of our parents went through in 2008 that we would be eager to start saving for retirement. That unfortunately is not the case. We also have not learned our lesson about personal debt that we should have learned a few years ago, but that’s a post for a different day.

Spending Like There’s No Tomorrow

As a recent college graduate I know many college graduates, and as I observe them I see an alarming trend. As a group we seem to be terribly financially illiterate and make unwise decisions with our new paychecks. They spend like there’s no tomorrow. For most, budgeting is simply checking the bank account before the card is swiped for the next coffee, meal, movie, etc. I see too many of my peers living paycheck to paycheck, not because they make too little, but because they spend too much. There is the new car they just had to get when they got that first job, then it’s Starbucks on the way into work, eating lunch out every day, buying new everything, and running up some credit card debt. On top of this most have no emergency fund, no savings, and don’t even think about opening up a retirement account. I hope this doesn’t describe you, and if it does I hope you’re wise enough to change your financial ways. The good news is that it won’t take all that much to change for a lot of us. Below I’ve listed out some steps you can take to make some wiser financial decisions.